this shop (now shut down) was asking for trouble when it ordered its sign saying it had been going for 40 years. it was committing itself to annual sign refreshes.
in the end, escalating sign costs lead to the demise of this once thriving premise. i imagine.
an ancient building in the shadow of a modern monstrocity. and two signs saying stop.
i waited three hours for someone to turn up for a meeting today, but they didn’t show, so by 6pm i gave up and went home. but as i came out the office i saw them in the pub across the road !
so i went in and he admitted he’d forgotten and was very emmbarrased. By the time we’d chatted i was over 2 hours late going home. so the two events which happened on the way home were really someone else’s events which i hyjacked. possibly.
anywoo, the first thing was hearing this phone box ring. in these days of mobile phones it’s rare to hear such thing so i jumped in to answer.
“hello”, “hello”, “who’s this?”, “it’s dave, who this?”, “mandy”, “hello”, “hello”, “where are you?”, “in a phone box”, “where”, “i don’t know, oh yes, there’s a street sign, Paddington Street”, “oh”, “why?”,”because someone just phoned me from there”, “oh, sorry, wasn’t me”, “oh, it was probably my sister”, “yes, probably”, “is she there”, “no, there’s no one in here but me”, “what about outside. she’s got very short hair. and she’s called Karen”, “just a minute, i’ll have a look”, “thanks”, “THERE’S A PHONE CALLED FOR A SHORT HAIRED LADY CALLED KAREN ? no, sorry, just shouted down the street, no one’s about”, “ok, well, thanks anyway”, “that’s ok”, “have a good evening”, “yes, and you”, “bye”, “bye”.
and then a little later on my journey i found this very smart (and expensive) 4 Megapixel camera. i’ve reported it to the relevant authorities and now need to wait until the owner claims it.
i’m going to take a photo of me, the finder, with it so when it gets reunited with its owner they’ll have a nice momento. perhaps i’ll give them a link to the site too. there weren’t any photos on the camera already. I’ll let you know how i get on:
i was sent these signs by reader marissa (not to be confused with reader rabbit). both are very good.
i particularly like the smartly dressedfulness of these two people. see how the older kid is pushing the smaller one in the back. she’s probably walking too slow. that’ll be because she’s a girl and everyone knows girls can’t walk fast.
or it might be because she hasn’t got any feet. and neither has the bloke. so perhaps he’s using her to steady himself.
i don’t know for sure. i’m just trying to interpret these things for you.
and how about this for a great sign. the problem is that they’ve assumed it will be people who will try and swim, yet it’s actually the ducks who have monopolised the place.
they should wrip that sign up and turn it the other way round.
or better two build a 2-sided one. they could then do one in english for people and one in duck-ish for duck people.
‘quack quack. quackety quack!” it’d say.
probably.
look at its pink bottom. surely that can’t be appropriate for a bollard ? it looks SO girly !
another pesky rat.
nobody likes old ice-cubes.
this skip is acces only meaning once you’ve climbed in you can’t climb out.
unless ‘acces’ isn’t a mispelling of the word ‘access’, but in fact a different word which means “you can put stuff in AND take it out”
they make these out of old car aerials you know …
this was a nice touch. it’s a dangly tea bag outside the window on my train this morning. it had been dipped in milky tea so left a trail behind as it swung backwards and forwards as the train accelerated.
so, what we ended up with was a time based wind splodge showing the trains’ acceleration ! what a great idea.
sadly these photos don’t do it justice, but i think you can see what i was getting at.
esther went to her first school disco last night. as her father i was very anxious. but all went well.
here she is warming up
this sign was just outside the permiter of the toilet roll ranger, but it wouldn’t surprise me if his (or her) jurisdiction had been extended.
the sign said ‘danger thin ice’. there certainly wasn’t any ice on the little pond so it must have been very thin.
or perhaps it was referring to the giant ice-cream painted on the wall next to the sign. that was as thin as some dried pain. which is quite thin. i think.
this sign was in the window of this little house by a play park in Hull.
i hope people read the sign before they go and do their ‘do’s. if not they’d have to gingerly waddle up to the window and knock whilst hoping no-one would see.
and who is this toilet roll dispensing duty ranger ? i bet he counts the sheets out one by one. i hope he rides a horse. rangers should do that kind of thing.
