hassock of the week


wild weather at sea as experienced recently around britain.

which reminds me – i am simply loving the shipping forecast on the way to work in the morning.  My alarm clock is fast and gets faster by about 5 minutes every month.  As a result i’m waking up at about 4.55am at the moment and am in my car heading to work around 5.15am.  for the first 10 minutes i listen to the shipping forecast which is simply lovely.  An example is ‘
Forties Cromarty Forth Tyne Dogger. 
Southwest backing south
. gale 8 to storm 10, veering
west, severe gale 9 to violent storm 11. Rain, then squally showers. Poor, becoming moderate.’ 

They also say things like ‘rough perhaps violent storm’ at the end.  i love the vagueness of that. you want more than ‘perhaps’ from experts.

read the latest reports here, although you really have to hear it to love it.

i wonder if for the modern age they should also do a shopping forecast giving reviews of shopping centres:
meadowhall, blue water, northerly traffic queues.  sales on. bargains possible.  frustration mild to strong, perhaps unbearable

or perhaps a sipping forecast:
“tea. strong. white. sugars 2, becoming sweeter.  perhaps tepid”.